What This Blog Is About

This has all happened a little differently than I thought it would. I came to Central America knowing little, and at first communication was a real struggle. I´ve used this blog as a space to write about my daily life. I´m primarily writing for myself: I have the feeling that this blog, and the five journals that I´ve scribbled in, will be a great present to myself in my old age.

But of course, I´m writing for you -- my friends and family -- as well. I want to let you know a little bit about what my life is like here. And when I can, I want to explain a bit about the people of Nicaragua, their history and culture, as I encounter it.

But while I´m trying to share my experiences with you, it is tricky sometimes to know how I should write about my own emotions. Mostly I´ve been happy here, and I´m certainly very glad I came. But I´m never sure exactly what people want to hear: I get the sense that both raving and complaining get obnoxious. Yet one must speak from the heart if one is to say something important. And when it comes to emotions, the truth is always more complex anyway.

When I first arrived it was lonely, and it took me a while to make friends. I just accepted that though, for I was used to it from India. I didn´t expect much at first, but I soon found that I hungered for friendships and connections. Over the course of weeks and months, however, things fell into place with my work, my group of friends in León, and then with Kamilla. During my final weeks in León, I was having one of the great times of my life: it was really perfect for me. And luckily, my travels around Central America were also as enjoyable. Now, though, that my work is finished and my family´s visit has finished, I think I´ll struggle a bit in these last few weeks: It feels like a lot of things have passed by before this is over and I´ll have to find a way to make this period of time meaningful. Just another challenge, really. I´ll face many more when I get home and move to Chicago.

Upon departing for Nicaragua, I had visions that I would be talking to people about the Sandinista Revolution and the Contra War, the way this country is developing, and what they hope for Nicaragua in the future. I do talk about these things with people sometimes, but it is not my main focus. At first, the language barrier made that impossible; it continues to make it difficult. But more to the point, these just aren´t the things that people think about each day. They are just living their lives normal people: going to work, sending their kids to school, taking care of their family, enjoying their free time when they get it. Daily life is rarely spectacular. And so it is that I´m writing about perhaps more superficial topics: the hammocks, the frescoes, the volcanoes, the small anecdotes I come across.

And when I think about it objectively, little that I´ve written in this spaces seems that gripping to me. While nice, none of this seems essential. If you want the best adventures and observations, you´ll have to go read my mass e-mails from India. Still, I´m pleased I´ve been able to document my experiences here so extensively. When I return home, I look forward to sprucing up this blog with the links and pictures I´ve thus far deprived you of. I think the blog will be a useful tool for finalizing my reflections on Nicaragua.

I know that one day it is my great ambition to write a book that speaks to core beliefs and experiences of a people, that expresses powerfully how political and environmental changes affect communities in individuals in the developing world. I think a work such as that will take a career to produce. And I´m ready for that. Perhaps now I´m just gaining the skills (linguistic, writing, personal, etc.) to do this. For now though I am just content to write about the life I´m living, exploring this place as a 23 year-old volunteering abroad in Central America.